Feeling Nostalgic

My twin sister had this cake made to celebrate our 40th.

It was yummy!


I can't believe I'm 40 years old. How is it that time has gone by so fast. It's scary when I think about how fast the next 40 years will go. I don't feel 40. I don't want to be 40. I remember when my Mom turned 40. I was 19. I thought age 40 was so far away, but here I am so soon.

I recently stumbled upon a wonderful blog that is fast becoming one of my favorites. The writer was discussing her ability to take a photo and make it "better" by fine tuning the features and "fixing" the flaws. At the end of her post she writes, "Show me the photos where beauty shines in the absence of perfection."

I love that quote! Why don't we choose to see the "perfection" in the flaws? Those flaws are what makes everyone and everything special, unusual and distinct. We should celebrate the flaws and let our beauty shine thru them, not be blocked by them (my therapist would be so proud!).

I'm hoping that God will allow me to stay on this earth for another 40 years (or more) ...to celebrate the "beauty" of real life. Flaws and all!

I have been inspired to share some of my favorite photos...some of which are "beautiful" with flaws. :-)

Are you kidding me?!? $89.05 for a tank of Gas!!!!

All I can say is WOW! We just filled up our gas tank and it cost us $89.05. I can't believe that gas prices have gone so high. We paid $3.39 a gallon. It's just awful. The sad thing is that it probably won't be getting any better.

Can't Sleep

I'm so tired of being tired! I've developed a problem with sleeping. Nasty little habit! I go thru spurts where I don't have any problem falling asleep and then there are times like now that I'm exhausted, but toss and turn when I'm in bed. I actually have a prescription for Ambien, but by the time I realize I can't sleep I'm afraid to take it because I don't want to be wiped out in the morning. I know, I know....I'm screwed either way!

I would love to be like my dear hubby, who before his head hits the pillow he's snoring. He could also sleep thru a tornado. He's such a brat!

One of the issues that I can't let go of right now is the fact that Spring Break is just two weeks away and I've got to lose about 75 pounds. Think I can do it?!? We are headed to Florida and will be visiting my identical twin sister who is literally half my size. Then after a few days at K's house, we will be heading on to the beach to meet several other families of which I will have the distinct honor of being the only Mom that is overweight and wearing a one piece tent...I mean bathing suit.

How the "he double l" can I have an identical twin who is half my size? Somehow she got all the skinny genes and I got all the fat ones. It is so unfair. I love my sister, please don't get the wrong idea. It's just so stinkin' hard when I get introduced as her twin. I know what people are thinking. I've even had a few older men actually say it out loud...to my face...."You two are TWINS?!...sure is a big size difference in the two of you!" Yeah, thanks for pointing that out...Mr. Obvious.

For normal people when you go on vacation, you don't run into many people you know. It's a time when you can relax and not worry about who is seeing you in a bathing suit because, hey you'll never see these people again, right? Well, we are not normal. There will be at least 11 families that we know from our hometown staying at the same place. They are wonderful people and we've known most of them for years. It's just that they've also known me when I was 75 pounds lighter and I can't stand the fact that I've gained most of the weight I lost back. I've always struggled with my weight. About four years ago, I lost 75 pounds and felt fantastic. I swore I would never gain it back. And now here I am, back to the disgusting old me. Lord, please help me get thru Spring Break. I want to enjoy my kids and the time I'll have with my husband and family and friends. I don't want to be miserable and uncomfortable the whole time I'm there.

OK, Enough of that!

Here is a conversation I had with Khoa today on the way home from pre-K.

Me: Did you have a good day at school? How was your runny nose?
Khoa: I picked my nose (big smile).
Me: Khoa, don't do that. You'll get in trouble and it's yucky!
Khoa: No I won't Mommy, I got under the table so no one could see me.

BOYS!!!!


I think I'm going to like having MY own blog. I don't know that I'll ever really have anything interesting to say, but I might surprise you now and then. You'll just have to check in from time to time and decide for yourself.

Why?

My husband wanted to know why I set up another blog. I guess I wanted to have a space where I could talk about whatever I wanted. It may not have anything to do with my kids or it may be about parenting. Who knows. All I know is that the other blog is dedicated to my three kids and when I posted about the new bathroom, it felt weird. Yes, my kids do use the new bathroom on occassion, but who cares about that!

I'm proud of the fact that my hubby has finally got it operational after three long years of working on it. Not that it really took him that actual amount of time. If he could have dedicated an entire week at once, then it would have been finished a long time ago, but that's not how it could be. We just had to do a little at a time and most of the time the 2nd bathroom took a back seat to everything else. I don't blame him. We choose to take vacations and do things on the weekends and sometimes, do nothing even though we were home!

How do you like the name of my new blog? I think it's very fun. As a mom, I get tired of saying things like that. Sometimes the best thing to do is just sit back and laugh. Not that I agree when my kids burp at the table. I think it's rude....but sometimes ya just gotta laugh! You know, choose which battles to fight and which to let go.

Speaking of which battles to fight.....I'm so tired of asking my kids to do something and getting the big "Awww Mom" ! Can't they just do it, once, without complaining? Rob and I were sick most of this past weekend and he had been feeling bad even before that. The girls didn't bother to do anything! We were hoping (like idiots) that they would at least do the dishes. Finally I got the kitchen straighted up and even did a few of the dishes. When they came home from church yesterday I told them I wanted them to finish the kitchen. You would have thought I had asked them to go push mow the snow or something! It's my fault. I've let them get a way with too much for too long. Now, don't take my complaining wrong. I've got the best kids in the whole world. They are kind and compasionate and love the Lord. It's not that. It's just that they have been given too much. I wanted them to grow up in a secure and happy home with both parents married and happy. The childhood I DID NOT have. I guess in wanting that so bad, I've instilled in them that they are "entitled" to what they get and WANT. How in the world do I reverse such a mistake? I don't want them to think that they are bad kids, but they need to know that they are responsible for things around our house and that they will treat their father and I with respect.

I get tired of saying all of the parenting "standards" such as: "You will NOT talk to me like that!" and "Clean your room!", and "Pick up your dirty clothes!", and "WHO left the dishes in the living room?" and "No, I will not make something else for dinner!", and "Would you talk to anyone else like that?" and..... the list could go on forever. I might as well be saying "Blah Blah Blah!" I think that's all they hear. How did I get to this point?!?

I've got some links to some great sites on the right hand side of this page. I wonder if any of those ladies have trouble with the same things I do? I guess I need to go do some reading. Right now I'm feeling like a failure as a Mom!!!!